Good friends – not heard of

Picture above was taken in Surfers Paradise, GD Australia March 13 2k15

“Do not be angry with the rain; it simply does not know how to fall upwards.”

Rainy days are the perfect days to sit back and write.Stormy, rainy, dark, bright, all of it looks the same to me.
Rain to me sounds so freeing and relaxing. It relieves all the stress and fuss that I am dealing with. Listening to the rain drop after drop, is beautiful in its own way – in many ways.

Its powerful in its own way. No one can stop the rain.
When the rain has passed it leaves a certain smell behind, a earthy type of smell.
– I like the smell of it.

I usually get quite inspired writing when looking out the window.
Pouring rain,as I sit by the window seat and wonder why today is a rainy day.
It throws flashbacks at me, to the happy days of my life. Remembering all the things that I’ve managed to accomplish within a year. Memories pop-up one by one, one after the ofter.

Then I remember what people have stamped me as in their heads.
“You are not there when I need you”, or “You are a bad friend” those are few of many different things that I am to people – apparently.
I try my hardest to make people around me happy – favours easily becomes demands instead. Because they know me well – They know when and how to use my time and I.

I last year did something out of my league. I’ve traveled three times to visit a friend of mine. 3 out of 10 of my trips were dedicated only to them. – was a friend of mine.
I tried to make the person satisfied at all times. Day or time,  didn’t matter to me. I’d show up in front of their front door in the middle of the night because they needed me, wanted to talk.

– I’ve tried way to hard to be stood up and called ugly things.
That I was the one who never would show up, that I am not there when they need me, that I don’t care? Hmm – Why does that sound very familiar to me?
Maybe because I am not that person, yet I think they themselves know who – them.
Traveling the other side of the world to see them – just to see them, and they can’t be grateful that they’ve got a friend who is willing to visit them in oh so many countries

Any time, anywhere – Hurts.

Looking above the skies – I now smile. I don’t need people who bring me down. I only need the ones who bring me upwards, and never downwards.
The thing is, some of these friendships took years to build, and some took way less. But what does years matter, if you can loose it all within seconds.

Its hard letting go. – A new mission

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